Imparfait.

I think we all have the ability to change the world in one way or another, each and everyday. We have the ability to smile at someone who looks sad, to hug someone who is having a tough time, to send an email or an sms to someone who needs a friend, we have the ability to love - and yet we don’t. We get caught up in our day-to-day lives that we forget to stop and love.

I think its odd how people think that their only way of expressing “love” to people is through charities, and in giving money - yet we are all guilty of this right? I’ll be completely honest, I constantly find myself avoiding people and instantly judging the people around me, yet people say that i’m a really “friendly” person. Sure, in the perfect surroundings we’re all friendly people, but its when we are out of our comfort zones that our true loving nature is revealed.

At my school, there used to be a little motivational poster in every classroom, to remind us of little things we often forgot, i remember reading one during some class about being left out. Every time i was in that room, i read it because every word made me realise the reality of the statement. Funnily enough, i can’t remember the exact words of it, but it was something like - “the biggest diseases of our world are not cancer, or heart disease, but rather being forgotten, being left out, being unwanted, being unloved.” And it’s 100 percent true. Physical diseases are big in our world, but emotional diseases are so much bigger. In our daily lives, we come across thousands of people; in the shopping centre, at work, on the street, but how many of us actually stop concentrating on ourselves and look around at these people. How many of us have given them a flicker of hope simply through the way we love?

We talk about “being like Jesus” but we are so unbelievably far from that. I think that as Christians, sometimes we have this mind-set, that because we’ve given our lives to God, we’ve done it all. I mean as long as I’ve recieved what i need, theres no need to give right? Wrong. Completely wrong. In this selfish world we live in, we take, take, take but never give. It’s so funny how we forget to love, but without any hesitation we preach and preach over people.

Jesus taught us how to love. He came down to this filthy world we live in to teach us how to love, and inevitably show us just how much he loved us - by dying the most excruciating death for our salvation. However, through his death he wanted us to realise the intensity of his love, and somehow reciprocate it to those who are hurting. He chose us to share his love - what an awesome responsibility, and yet how many of us can honestly say we’ve taken it seriously?

One thing I struggle with, is remembering that God loves the person next to me just as much as he loves me. He doesn’t love them less, he doesn’t frown upon them - he LOVES them, just as much as he loves me. Wow. I honestly struggle with that, can anyone relate? I so often make judgements based on the way a certain person acts or dresses, but God loves that person. He loves them, and has chosen us to show them that love. When people are hurt, they hurt people, but God uses us as his tools to lead these broken people back to the one who first loved them. He has chosen us, to reveal his love to them.

It only takes one person to make an effort in someones life to see a transformation begin. We were all called to love. Every one of us can change the world simply by the way we love.

how can I stand here with you, and not be moved by you?

Man. God is pretty amazing hey?

This post is a little different to my other posts, because i feel the need to share some stuff that God has been doing in my life so far. I have so many emotions right now, like i want to jump up and shout and scream because God is doing some awesome things in my life. I’ve just got back from Harvest camp, and man, God seriously did some amazing things to me there. I have no idea where to start..

Have you ever felt like you were trapped by something? Like you were sort of hiding something from everyone, including yourself because you just didnt want to deal with it? It’s funny how God speaks to us. I was sitting in the 3rd row, next to a good friend of mine when the speaker said; “the only way you can grow is by bringing the crap from your life into the light and allowing God to set you free.” As soon as this statement was said, i felt this massive weight over my shoulders, the Holy Spirit was obviously trying to tell me something. I tried to not think about it, ignore it - cos i’ve TOTALLY dealt with that stuff yeh? NO. God was pressing into me cos he wants me to go further, and get rid of all the crap i chose not to deal with until now.

You hear stories and testimonies from people who all say the same thing; that things in their life stuffed up, because they didn’t deal with something God wanted them to deal with and just ignored it. They went on with life pretending nothing had happened because its too hard to deal with something now, so they would deal with it later. What happens when they deal with it? God rips into that stronghold in their life and mends the broken pieces of their life.

But why wait? Why wait til something actually goes wrong in your life to realise that you need to deal with something God clearly wants you to deal with now. Man. I think it’s awesome that God wants to use me. I am so thankful for the fact that i am only 18, and God is setting me free. He is breaking those strongholds in my life, so that i can live a life that is devoted to him.

Nothing is too big for God to forgive. Nothing is too big for God to repair. He is a God of the impossible and you know what, if he can set me free from all the stuff in my life, he can set you free too. All you need to do is say the word.

I was lying down, trying to sleep, but obviously couldn’t. Do you ever have those moments where you are desperate for sleep but you keep thinking about random thoughts and then realise that the only way you’re going to get to sleep is by not thinking? Well i have these moments a lot, and one night i was half asleep, and came across a really weird thought…

Could you imagine if Bill Gates decided that coming up with computer software was too hard, and decided to be a sales person instead? What programs would our computers have? If not microsoft, then what would we use? What about word, what would we write our essays on? How would we create powerpoint presentations if there was no such thing as microsoft powerpoint, or publisher or excel. How different would our lives be? Our lives are centered around technology, and computers have become a necessity in our society. But just think for a moment, how different our lives would be without them.

So that was a bit random, but i guess it was an intro to the point im trying to get at. One person, has the ability to completely change the way the world thinks and lives. ONE person. How different would our world be if Martin Luther King Jr or Nelson Mandela decided that racial discrimination was okay, our world would be quite different. I think we often forget how much potential one person has. We so often second guess ourselves and assume that we are not good enough or smart enough to ever impact our world, but maybe its our message that the world desperately needs to hear.

I think God created us all with the ability to impact the lives of many, but because of our imperfections, we decide that what we have to share is not good enough because, “the guy sitting next to me can tell the story so much better than I can.” How many times have you done that? I know i have done it many times. You feel like what you have to offer has no weight at all because the person that did something before you, did it so much better than you ever can. It’s so silly, we compare ourselves way too much, and because of this we fail to reach our potential or exceed it.

We need to stop thinking about how much better other people are and start focusing on what we can do. God wants us to impact, he knows we can, but we being humans assume that the person next to us can do it so much better. I think that frustrates God, he knows how much we can achieve but we sit back because we’ll never be “good enough” - its like that feeling when your teaching someone something and just as they are about to grasp the concept of it, they give up.

You and I have the ability to change the world. One person can completely change the way a generation lives and thinks. Are you going to let the person next to you do all the work, or are you going to get in there and do what God has called you to do?

One person is all it takes.

Have you ever listened to a song so many times that all of a sudden you see the lyrics in a new light? I was walking home from work a few days ago and had yellow by coldplay on the loudest volume on my ipod. Usually when i’m walking back from work, the music i listen to is just noise, and my head is usually in a different place, but on that day i was carefully examining every single word Chris Martin was singing - “Look at the stars, look how they shine for you” and all of a sudden, it wasn’t Chris Martin singing to me; it was Jesus.

It’s funny isn’t it, how something like a completely secular song can bring you closer to Christianity and Jesus than an hour long sermon or an intense worship song. I don’t know why, but theres something about these lyrics that bring me back to Jesus, when ever im starting to drift. Can anyone relate? Maybe not. I guess it’s different for everyone, but just think how amazing would it be, if every person that has ever listened to that song, heard it they way i did. Man, that would be awesome.

It’s cool how God can reveal himself to us in so many different ways, i guess in order for us to notice it, we need to know how he works in our lives. I used to always think that cos God did something for someone, it would happen the exact same way for me. But it doesn’t work like that, God doesn’t work like that. He likes to surprise us, keep us waiting, not cos he likes to put us through drama, but cos he wants us to grow, and learn. Yet so often people slide away because of this. They start to think that because things aren’t going their way its cos God hates them, that he doesn’t care or something crazy like that. If anything, he puts us through trials cos he loves us, and he wants us to go that one step further cos he knows we can, but we become afraid of his timing and his will that we just give up and instead of taking a step forward, we take ten steps back.

It’s hard sometimes to let go and let God, but when we do the changes that begin to happen in our lives are amazing. I know i’ve gone off on a tangent but seriously, find out how God works in your life, live by his timing and his word and see the changes start to happen.

Wanna know what God has done in my life? Ask me.

It was late at night, the house was quiet, the clock was ticking and it would seem that i was sitting on my bed, only I was not. I was at a different place, you know the place we all know so well yet loathe so much; the place of uncertainty. I don’t really like this place. when I’m here, i tend to find myself asking questions that have no answers and having answers without the questions. Does that make sense? I guess not, its all a bit blurry at the moment. It was during this visit that i grabbed out my journal and started writing questions, and answers, and questions, and answers, and so on. As i was questioning certain things, i started rambling on about something interesting. Something that actually made sense.

The drafting process. Have you ever been at that place when absolutely nothing makes sense? You feel as if you’ve wasted all this time working on certain things to simply be rewarded with failure? Ah, i know that feeling all too well, and i guess i was looking for an answer to it. As i questioned so many things about my life i somehow came to the idea of the drafting process. I believe that my life right now, or the life i plan to live is not the life that has been planned for me. I think what I’m living in at the moment is sort of like the “drafting process”. You know, that long and painful process where changes and mistakes are inevitable, the part where nothing is certain until the plan is completed.

I think God has this massive plan out there for each of us, but before he lets us experience it, he wants to make sure we’re prepared. So he puts us through this difficult journey where we are tested to our limits. He wants us to be ready to take on whatever it is he has planned, he wants us to go through this drafting process before we can start to live out his plan. Although this process is somewhat unbearable, i think the gifts we reap once our plans are completed far outweigh the changes we have to face. Picture it like this, imagine if an apartment building was constructed using the drafts and plans of a law firm - it wouldn’t really fulfil its purpose right? I know, its a bit of a lame example, but you get the picture. God wants us to go through this drafting journey so we are built ready for his plans.

I think I’ve just begun the drafting process, I don’t fully understand what plans will eventuate from the draft. But i can tell you this, it will be amazing.

“God visits us, but most of the time we are not at home”

I’m not really sure who said that, but think about it. I know i have to.

Galatians 4:7 “So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir.” To get the whole gist of this post, it may be necessary for you to read Galatians 4… just a warning.

Is it just me, or do you constantly find yourself trapped in a place you loathe? You feel like you can’t get out because your feet are in too deep. You feel like you have to stay as a form of penance, as if you were forced into this situation as a result of your past. You can’t help but wonder what liberty tastes like, but you know not to try it, as it will simply make your current situation worse. You hope and pray that this tunnel you’re in has an end and that there will be an escape out of your prison. But for some reason you believe that this slavery will never come to an end.

Slavery. No, not the ancient Egyptian type of slavery, but slavery under the “principals of the world”. The world has made us believe that we are slaves. Slaves to money, friends, media, music, jobs..and the list could go on. Whats more, is that we as “sons” believe that we too are slaves to the world. We have been brainwashed with the idea that we are slaves, and that we cannot escape.

But we are not slaves. We are heirs. We don’t have to feel as though we are forced into situations, or that we have no escape. Why, you ask? Because God made sure of this. Jesus - being omnipotent, could have chosen to come to earth as an angel, or prince or something really really amazing. But he didn’t. He chose to come into the world, the same way you and I did. He chose to be born out of a woman and to work as a carpenter. This is Jesus; our God, he could have been born into royalty - but he chose to be born into a working class family. He chose to bear pain for our sins and our salvation. He CHOSE to die for you and me. I don’t know if I can make that any more clear. Jesus, decided to go through the most excruciating pain for your freedom, so that you and I would no longer be slaves, but heirs.

I don’t know what else to say, except that if you ever feel as though you are the slave in a situation, just remember that God has made you a son. YOU, are royalty in the kingdom of heaven. You have someone that loves you so much that they decided to go through the worst pain imaginable to set you free. God has freed you from slavery, and made you an heir.

What more could you ask for?

“No more wasting your life chasing dead ideals.
See the past? It’s gone. Let’s roll on with the show.” Quoted from the song; Your Other Hand - Clare Bowditch.

I really like Clare Bowditch’s music, I’m not really sure if shes Christian or not, I’d assume not, but some of her songs may suggest otherwise (People Like Me, People Like You - look up the lyrics and you’ll see what I mean). Anyway, I was listening to her album today, and I don’t usually listen to this song cos the start of it is very ‘folky’ and it sort of puts me off, but i decided to listen to it today. As soon as I heard that section of the bridge, I felt something click in my head.

I think that too often we find ourselves contemplating the past, rather than embracing the future. I find myself doing so on many many many many MANY occasions. “I wish I did this, didn’t do that, didn’t say this, said no, asked why” etc. But there is no point in drowning yourself with thoughts of what you could have done, but didn’t do. You can’t change the past, cos “It’s gone”. God doesn’t want us to live in the past, because when we live in the past, we learn nothing - we simply repeat our mistakes and live in a cycle of sin and shame. Jesus didn’t die for us to simply regret and wallow in self pity. He died to set us free, free from shame, guilt and pain, but we need to embrace this freedom he lovingly gave us. By continuously chasing your past, not only are you wasting precious time, but you are fighting a losing battle.

However, that said, we can’t simply continue on with life without changing things about ourselves. Mistakes and experiences from the past all work together to craft us into unique individuals. If we simply make our mistakes and continue making the same mistakes, life turns into a sequence of pain. I believe we make mistakes for a simple reason - we are imperfect. But God made us this way, he didn’t want us to be prim and perfect people. He lets us make bad choices, but he does so with the hope that we will all come to our senses and learn from our mistakes. God wants us to look back on the past and see where we went wrong so that we can grow not only in maturity, but in faith.

I guess what I’m trying to say in this short entry is that, living in the past is like being dead - No growth occurs. We need to embrace the time we have, and learn from our past to create a worthwhile future for ourselves.

This is my first “proper post”, probably because its the only one I’m actually publishing. So, I decided to start a blog against the wishes of my friends, but I felt it was necessary. Hopefully I’ll use this and it will actually be somewhat productive. The name you ask? Imparfait. What does it mean? Imperfect. Why? Because that is exactly what I am, and I am not ashamed of it. We all have our imperfections, they are what make our perfections beautiful. Back to my post..

More

Why do we rely on people, more than we rely on God? Why do we trust in the creation of man, more than the creation of our creator. Everything in our lives has to be detailed, precise and perfect. Why can’t we simply be happy with what we have, why can’t we settle for the simple pleasures? Why do we always want more? More money, more power, more friends, more time, more love - because the world “said so”. Because 1 hug is not enough, 1 book is not enough, 1 minute is not enough, 1 lover is not enough. Why are we always demanding more? Because the world has made us this way.

But we are Christians. We were born to want more, but as we grow through our faith and experiences we learn to be happy with what we have. Everything becomes sufficient - unfortunately, even with God. 10 minutes a day or week with God becomes enough. Our relationship with God is when we should want more. We should teach ourselves to not let the ways of the world affect the way we communicate with our creator. Our relationship with God shouldn’t be “second best”. We should be striving for the best relationship we could ever imagine with God - and then when we reach that point, we should want more. We need to train ourselves to hunger not for the things of this world, but for God. We need to be hungry for his word, his love, his relationship with us.

I challenge you, as I challenge myself, to want more of God. To choose God over a bad relationship, choose God over drugs, over alcohol, over death. Instead of turning to people, turn to God. Trust him above all things.